lauer, la as soon as i heard the name, i was just completely shocked, like, that i knew this person. >> evil visited this community. >> there was sobbing, people throwing themselves on the floor. it was awful, excuse me. letting them talk about their fears is calming. but young children do not need to hear the nitty gritty. >> they had their entire lives ahead of them. our hearts are broken today.

good evening and welcome to a special hour of coverage, lester holt is in our new york studios, and our team is here in what must be tonight the saddest place on earth. newtown, connecticut. it was here in the even smaller hamlet called sandy hook at the local elementary school grades k through 4, that a young man heavily armed wearing black, started firing today. he killed 20 children and six adults before taking his own life. and this is one of two crime scenes in this same town tonight. this small new england town at the northern edge of the new york suburbs and the middle of the connecticut countryside, and all decorated for christmas has just been destroyed. everybody in this country, from the president of the united states on down has the same question tonight. how could someone have done this, and how could someone have

killed these kids? tonight, lester holt starts off the broadcast with a look at what has become one of of the darkest days in modern american history. >> reporter: the families who live in small newtown, connecticut, 80 miles northeast of new york city called it the safest place in america. green and peaceful and great for kids. and then today. >> just after 9:30 this morning, newtown police received a 911 call for an emergency at the elementary school. >> reporter: police transmissions crackled with emergency. soon, police both on duty and off were converging on the school, rushing toward what was once the safest of havens, but now a crime scene. >> i will need two ambulances at this time. >> reporter: within minutes, a reverse 911 call went out to parents. >> due to reports of the shooting as yet unconfirmed the district is taking preventive measures by putting all schools

in lockdown until we ensure safety of all students and staff. thank you. >> reporter: the awful details of what happened inside sandy hook elementary school are still emerging tonight. connecticut state police spokesperson lieutenant paul vance said the gunman opened fire in a single area of the school. >> the shootings did take place in one section of the school in two rooms. >> reporter: but tonight, it is the children themselves giving us first hand accounts of what went on inside the school. >> the teacher told us to go in the library and get behind something, so no way -- since there is a window and no door the guy wouldn't see us. >> reporter: children, who were just learning their numbers, were suddenly counting off gunshots. >> how many gunshots would you say you heard as you were in this hallway? >> well, i think it was something like ten.

>> reporter: in the midst of the horror, the kids say teachers stayed calm. >> i was in the gym, and i heard like seven loud booms. and the gym teachers told us to go in the corner. so we all huddled. and i kept hearing these booming noises. >> reporter: this young man said his nine-year-old sister was in art class. >> they were hiding in the closet, and tiny closet, all bundled up. and they were hearing screams, and it was horrible. >> reporter: at some point, the shooting stopped. the children and teachers hiding in closets, under desks and behind book cases, heard the sound of police calling out, you're safe. >> our main objective was to evacuate as quickly as efficiently as possible. any and all students and faculty in the school. >> reporter: but they made sure about one thing. police told the children to close their eyes as they passed by the school's main office. they walked in single file. a chain of children here to the

nearby sandy hook fire department, which had become a maze of police cars, fire trucks and ambulances. helicopters hovered over head. parents hearing the news came racing up the hill in their cars, desperate for information. >> there is no words that i could come up with that would even come close to describing the sheer terror of hearing that your son is in a place where there has been violence, and you can't do anything to immediately help them. or protect them. >> reporter: others stood around waiting, helpless, stunned. >> there is really no words to express the magnitude of this. you know, you send your child to school, you think they're going to be safe. they're happy. and all of a sudden you get a phone call. there is a text, there has been a shooting at your child's school. >> reporter: two children were seen being carried from the school. >> they looked very pale, very injured. it was bad. >> i know some of them i am not going to see them.

>> reporter: parents lucky enough to find them safe held them tight. and the questions began. >> i don't know how they came in, because every time you go in you have to ring a bell. >> reporter: people began lining up outside in nearby churches to pray. the sheer numbers overwhelmed not just the community but all of community. officials had to pull in medical examiners from out of state, attention soon focused on the shooter. >> breaking news right now, state police are responding to a report of a school shooting in newtown, connecticut. >> reporter: he has been identified as twenty-year-old adam lanza, police and officials say he was dressed in black and armed with at least two guns when he entered the school. his target was apparently the kindergarten classroom. he walked in and opened fire. then police say he killed himself. and just when they thought he had recovered all the victims, police found one more. this time not at the school. a body believed to be lanza's

mother was discovered inside her newtown home where the shooter also lived. >> the secondary crime scene, there is a deceased adult at the secondary crime scene. >> reporter: police later searched his car, house and brother's home in new jersey. so far, no one has been able to answer the key question, why did he do it? >> our citizens, beautiful children had their life taken away from them. >> reporter: in the meantime, governor dan malloy tried to find a way to comfort not just the community but his shell shocked state. >> what has happened, transpired at the school building will leave a mark on this community and every family impacted. i only -- ask that all of our fellow citizens here in the united states and around the world who have already offered their assistance, remember all of the victims in their prayers.

>> reporter: a sentiment echoed by the president himself, ordering all flags to be flown at half staff. later he addressed the country. >> i know there is not a parent in america who doesn't feel the same overwhelming grief that i do. the majority of those who died today were children. beautiful little kids between the ages of five and ten years old. >> reporter: tonight, an all-too common scene in this country. a candlelight vigil as another community tries to absorb the violence that visited it. and mourn the innocence lost. that community, newtown, and today was the second deadlieies shooting after the virginia tech massacre, which, brian, took 22 lives. >> a short time ago on this very

spot, in fact, i was joined here by two police lieutenants who have been on the scene here all day. from the connecticut state police, the man we have been watching on television all day. lieutenant paul vance. and from the local police department here in newtown, lieutenant george sinko. first of all from the state police perspective, how much can we all know? how much are we allowed to know tonight about what you have seen on this scene. >> well, this is truly a horrific situation, that we encountered here in newtown. it started at 9:30 this morning, when the emergency call came into newtown police, and emergency responders immediately were called for help. and the rescue process began. and many children and staff were rescued. but as you well know, 20 children didn't make it and six adults didn't make it out of that school. >> reporter: lieutenant sinko, this is your jurisdiction, your town, when a call comes in,

shots fired, sandy hook elementary school it must not have sounded real. >> exactly, that is exactly what i thought. that it was going to turn out to be a miscommunication. unfortunately, that was not the case. >> reporter: these are friends and these are neighbors? >> yes, yes, it is a small community here. things like this just don't happen in this town. and good people, that -- just not something we thought we would ever see. >> reporter: lieutenant, how about all the first responders you have seen? >> well, we have done everything we can, it is important to note that between the fire, the ems and personnel that responded they needed counseling, too. it is difficult to see human beings that have been murdered and killed. it is even more difficult when they're children. and this scene was horrific. it s heart wrenching and something that we'll never get over. >> reporter: was this victim known to you? or was he just one of the anonymous citizens who lived

among us as recently as this morning? >> we're not going to comment on the specifics. you know, obviously he is a resident of the town. but we're certainly going to look at every avenue with the resolution as best as we can. >> reporter: lieutenant sinko, what can you say to a national audience on behalf of your town? >> just that these are good people here. things like this should not happen to people like that. and -- there are no words that can ever really you know, satisfy someone in this situation. there just isn't. and all we can do is the best we can to try to leave no stone unturned and try to answer all the questions about why this happened. >> reporter: two veteran police officers, it has become a cliche, no one expects this in the town where they live, especially, not newtown, coun

connecticut. we can't repeat this often enough. some of these houses date back to the mid-1700s. and as both police officers couldn't repeat often enough this story has become about these families. here we are, days away from christmas and they have lost their pride and joy. we have a look at some of the loss in this town tonight from nbc's ann curry. >> reporter: as hard as it is to comprehend this tragedy, keeping them safe, what happened today is unbearable. >> everyone kind of works together, so it is hard. >> reporter: erin is a behavioral therapist. she works one-on-one with kindergartners and pre school students. she doesn't work on friday, so as fate would have it she was out of the line of fire. her father texted her after the

attack. >> it makes me happy i was not there, but guilty i was not there, as well, to help. >> reporter: we were with erin and several of their friends today when with lumps in their throats, they waited together, with word about what happened to their colleagues and their students. >> just to not be there and not to have any information it is hard to hear everything through the news. >> reporter: details trickled in, and they were dreadful. >> i don't even know how to wrap my head around the fact that so many children were killed. knowing the ages at the school, they're so little and they're so tiny and they're so innocent. i can't -- i can't even there are not words to express. >> reporter: and then something nobody expected. a call with the worst possible news. one of her students was gone. >> no, no. >> reporter: just a short distance away, monsignor robert

weiss of the st. rose catholic church in newtown had been called to help. he tried to give solace to their parents. >> the intensity of emotions is really hard to put into words. there was sobbing. there was yelling. there was people throwing themselves on the floor. and it was a whole range of emotions. and there were people, you know, hugging each other. settling down, and it would come back to them again, and you would hear an outburst. >> reporter: the parents ached for children, and children ached for children. >> some of them wanted to go home, but they were conflicted. they didn't want to leave their friends. they were really conflicted whether or not to leave. they wanted to just be together. it is surreal. >> reporter: and in those surreal moments, reality descended with intense cruelty. >> one of the ladies, her phone went off, she was supposed to take her little boy to a cub

scout meeting, but she realized they wouldn't take him. >> reporter: after the governor announced the full scale, again defenses kicked in. and denial. >> it was just a matter of hugging them and praying with them. there are many, many places right now themselves, emotionally, i think there are some that are still not quite sure this is real. >> reporter: though the pastor helped others cope with death on a regular basis he had never had to deal with anything like this. >> that was awful, excuse me. i mean. these are 20 people that the week before christmas that just lost their joy -- how do you -- how do you live with that? monsignor weiss doesn't doubt the community will get support, but he wonders how to even begin to help children understand. >> how do you recover from something like that? how do you help a child walk through the front door of the

school, you know, the next day they have class or not see the principal or any other staff that really cared about them. or their friends. >> reporter: one source of resilient moments for this school is the small size and closeness. everyone seems to know everyone here, brian, and tonight it felt like no one was really alone, in churches, around kitchen tables, all across this little community. people came together to begin to help each other bear this unbearable loss. >> this is very hard to discuss. the police told me tonight that the bodies of the children have started to come out of the school. their parents were able to be with them all day, and into tonight to make police officer identifications. a word to our viewers. we have tried to show the same sensitivity. and i think this is true, to these families as we would want in our own lives. it is just -- this town has been

torn apart and the degrees of separation, ann, are down to one and two familyings. everyone knows somebody. >> reporter: exactly, right, and we in fact met several families, and exactly to your point earlier. so many of them were so traumatized. there was no way we would actually put them on camera. and what happened at this fire house, the families after they gathered, you heard the monsignor talk about it, the families were taken, family by family, to identify their children. can you imagine the difficulty in that building right behind us and the heartbreak? and so perhaps it is just right that the world has been paying attention. >> we have been saying all day, this is a local volunteer fire house the way most of our fires get fought in this country, larger than most, because we're right alongside the interstate here. these are citizen volunteers who were going on about their lives today when they were called to be first responders.

and tonight, the fbi is in there. people have been bringing food by and comforting everybody. it is a rough, rough time. ann curry with us, back to you, lester holt. >> and we try to understand why anyone would want to hurt children. for much of the day, law enforcement was struggling to answer even the most basic question of just who was the alleged gunman. tonight, with some of those who knew him the picture is starting to take shape. here is chris hansen. >> reporter: as darkness descended here in this neighborhood, filled with beautiful homes and decorations, so did the horror and confusion. when jim mcdade first heard the sirens this morning, he had no idea the alleged shooter had been living right down the block. >> when i first heard the news, i said that is not happening, it is not real.

then when the news broke, i said -- i was numb. >> reporter: but in the early chaos of the tragedy, finding answers became a tangled web. first, there was a description, the shooter wore black, and authorities did say the suspect was dead. >> the shooter is deceased, deceased in the school. >> reporter: they said they had a name. >> ryan lanza. >> reporter: but local police were not officially identifying the shooter. >> we have not made any police officer identifications. we are working on that. there are some preliminary identifications made. but we have as i said, a great deal of work. >> reporter: but other law enforcement sources identified the shooter as ryan's twenty-year-old brother, adam lanza. >> we know this began this morning when the man as police say, twenty-year-old adam lanza. >> reporter: tonight, law enforcement sources confirmed that twenty-year-old adam lanza lived here in the newtown

community with his mother, nancy. they said he was very reclusive, he had no job, but was considering going back to school. his mother, nancy, was found dead today. the cause, a single gunshot wound to the face. we went looking for people who knew this family. she used to drive the family to scho school. the young man who is the alleged shooter and his brother, how would you describe them? >> well, i had them on the bus many years ago. they were quiet, reserved and shy. that is how i would describe them. well-behaved kids. >> reporter: did they stick out in any way? >> no, no, average kids. >> reporter: mora mcdade used to ride the same bus with the lanza brothers to school. what went through your mind when you heard this? >> as soon as i heard it, i was just completely shocked that i knew this person, that i grew up with him, just weird. >> reporter: police ended up

taking ryan lanza in for questioning. but authorities made it clear they thought the guam acted alone. >> right now there is one shooting. but they're still looking at every ancillary fact related to the scene. >> reporter: investigators say adam lanza was carrying his brother's id when he shot up the school, adding to the confusion. law enforcement authorities are reporting that the guns used in the crime were registered to nancy lanza, adam's mother, and were all legally purchased. but why he turned those guns on children is still a mystery tonight. >> and chris hansen joins us now from newtown. chris, has the family been able to shed any light on a possible motive? >> reporter: you know, lester this one still has law enforcement shaking their heads. it is early in the investigation. but as far as they can tell there are no oftbvious indicato

as to why he would do this. there are no rantings on facebook, or social media. they really couldn't provide much. in fact, lanza's brother said he hadn't even talked to adam in many, many months. >> and i know right now authorities are involved in that very sensitive and difficult process, the identification of the victims. but that said, do we have any ideas when they might release the names of the families affected? >> reporter: it could be a while. they have one of the best investigative teams in connecticut, if not the world. they are going to go through and find every piece of potential evidence that they can. it will likely be a few days before they wrap that up and they're in a position to actually release the identities of the bodies. >> and what do the sources tell you is next in this investigation? >> reporter: well, it is all going to be about evidence. you know, obviously, this suspected shooter is dead. he killed himself today. they have recovered the weapons.

the assault type rifles, handguns he had with him. they found other weapons in his car. they will be looking at that and really right now, it is all about the school, what happened. >> thank you, let's go back to brian. well, lester, as you know i happen to be partial to first responders. anyway, but it tells you something about the scope of this tragedy, even the first responders to the scene today. and those include police officers, state police, but also the local volunteers. even those first respond ers wee all assigned grief counselors because of what they had to see and deal. the nearest hospital is in danbury, connecticut. they were put on full alert just after the shooting. personnel came in, they were warned to prepare for the very worst. sadly, though, that is not what happened. we pick up that part of the story with nbc's andrea canning.

>> reporter: after the shooting the schools in newtown were in lockdown. and so was danbury hospital as the emergency room staff braced to receive the wounded. dr. john murphy is head of the hospital. >> currently under lockdown, the reason for that is an abundance of caution. we want to be sure we allow the team to focus at hand. >> i allowed four teams, one in each trauma room. >> reporter: dr. pat broderick is in charge in the emergency room. so you obviously have plans in place for this type of emergency? >> we rehearse this and practice it, and hope we don't need this in an emergency. everybody goes back to basic training and does whatever they need to do to be helpful. >> reporter: just after 10:00 in the morning, the victims start coming, one after the other,

each five minutes apart. two children, one adult, all suffering from serious gunshot wounds. >> in many serious situations when you have gunshots of this magnitude. the amount and significance of the injuries is just tremendous. and i'll just say that today's events were just a tragedy that you could not even ever in your wildest dreams imagine for your community. >> reporter: because this is a trauma hospital, doctors and nurses are prepared for the worst. and today they got the call to expect a lot of victims. but after the first three arrived, no more victims came through their doors. you're ready for possibly a lot of people to come in here, a lot of children, and then when you don't see the people coming what is going through your mind at that point? >> it was traumatic in and of itself. in that we all knew what that meant. this must have been what they felt on 9/11. when there was an expectation that there would be many, many

injured. and when they didn't come, in a sense it just compounded the tragedy of what we were facing. >> reporter: trauma teams are trained to be methodical. but this training, this was deeply personal. many of the staff live in newtown or know somebody who does. >> it is enormously sad. we're all grieving. i don't think there is a person here who doesn't know somebody who was affected. and i think there are going to be moments of great sorrow, given that they were exposed to some things that i don't think any professional ever contemplates they're going to have to deal with. >> reporter: andrea, i have to say parts of this reminded me of the 9/11 in new york city, the hospitals were alerted to expect so many injured and wounded. it didn't happen because of the heavy loss of life. and you have got all of these

hospital staff members clinging on to any bit of good news they can get. >> reporter: and that is exactly what the head of the hospital mentioned, is 9/11. exactly what you just said. >> and so tonight, the town kind of takes its collective breath, everyone gathering at these houses of worship. the hospitals are back down to normal. they wanted to do more. and they just could not. >> reporter: yeah, and you know it was with such a heavy heart that we had to report that these two children didn't make it. you know we were really hoping they were going to pull through. we did get some good news just before the broadcast. the adults, we don't know, male or female, did pull through and was expected to make it. so one family will get their loved one home. >> andrea canning after a day of reporting here in newtown. when we come back, how the entire nation reacted to the news of this day. and what kind of conversation this might start.

this was just too much. >> i know there is not a parent in america who doesn't feel the same overwhelming grief that i do. the majority of those who died today were children. beautiful little kids between the ages of five and ten years old. they had their entire lives ahead of them. birthdays, graduations, weddings. kids of their own. >> all day, reporters covering the tragedy, many of them parents themselves wrestled to hold their emotions at bay. >> there are reports that the children were told to cover their eyes as they fled past the

school's main office. >> and inside that room of kindergartners where most of the casualties took place. >> kindergartners. i don't know. i don't have any words for it. >> reporter: just yesterday, children in this close knit community were eagerly anticipating christmas. but now, instead of dreaming about gifts under the tree, they will be haunted by nightmarish images from a morning of terror. connecticut's governor, malloy, struggled to come to grips with this indescribable tragedy. >> evil visited this community today. children, beautiful children, who had simply come to school to learn. their day ended a very different way than any of us could possibly have imagined. and quite frankly as we stand

here today still can't imagine. >> reporter: in newtown and across the nation, flags were lowered in sorrow. the entire country plunged into an angry sadness. >> oh, my god, not again. >> i don't understand why people can have just awful killing machines for no reason, for what reason? it is just horrible. >> my heart's bleeding for these families and -- i just don't know what to say. >> reporter: and tonight, candlelight vigils from the white house. >> our first act will be an act of prayer. >> reporter: to churches right in newtown, honored the victims. >> thank you, for gathering on this most horrible day in our history. >> reporter: in the frenzy of the holidays we are suddenly a nation brought to a horrified halt. as he offered prayers to the loved ones, house speaker john

boehner announced there would be no weekly address tomorrow. even twitter, usually abuzz with the usual topics, all said, pray for newtown. >> how many times have we heard it? a man dressed in black with a gun opens fire at a school, in an office, at a theater, in a mall. today the shooting in connecticut was one of the worst in history. and each time we're forced to revisit that list which just seems to continue to grow and grow. before one community has even begun to heal it seems to happen to another. and the same questions are asked all over again. here is sherry harry smith >> reporter: this week, just three days ago, a gunman went to the mall in clackamas, oregon, he killed two strangers then killed himself. his victims were a much-loved hospice nurse and a coach, who one friend called "bigger than life."

we were disturbed by the shooting because it took place at a busy mall filled with holiday shoppers. but these events don't stay with us for long. the dead are buried and the new cycle moves on. perhaps we have become enured to the horror. april, 1999, 12 students and one teacher, shot and killed in columbine, colorado, 21 more survived with gunshot wounds among them, craig scott. >> the day of the shooting at columbine, it was the worst day of my life. this is worse than columbine. these are little kids that we are talking about. and so many parents' hearts are breaks out there. and i'm sure that many little kids don't understand what happened. >> reporter: columbine is synonymous with mass shootings. the pictures of students fleeing the school are images we personalized. what would we do if something

like that happened in our schools? what if somebody with a gun went in and hurt our kids? >> it is something you can't imagine, but it is -- you go into shock. it is almost surreal like it is not happening. at first it doesn't seem real, and it takes some time for that shock to wear off. and the people that were at the school that day, they're in shock right now and they will be for a while. >> reporter: columbine was an event so terrible that schools around the country developed protocols so teachers would know how to protect their students in similar situations. protocols teachers used today to save lives in connecticut. >> we all started -- well, we didn't scream. we started crying, so all the teachers told us to go into the office, where no one could find us. >> reporter: that we even have procedures in place to protect our kids from events like this is worth contemplating. does it mean we have decided this kind of violence is something we just have to live with? april 2007, 32 people are killed

and 17 are injured during a mass shooting at virginia tech, colin goddard was one of those hit by the gunfire. >> i think i was one of those americans who think as long as we live in nice places and you know, send our kids to good schools this is not going to happen to us. and i learned that even there you can become a victim of gun violence. >> reporter: this was the massacre that stopped us cold. all that promise, snuffed out in an instant. all that unspeakable suffering. all that fear again. >> there is not one thing that is going to stop all shootings in this country. you know? but we can do better. than 100,000 americans hit by a bullet every year. >> reporter: january, 2011, six people were killed and 13 were injured in a strip mall parking lot where congresswoman gabrielle giffords was holding a constituency meeting, a meet and greet. shock, horror, more in mourning.

this happened with more frequency. the shooting at the sikh temple in wisconsin this summer guns are used to kill more than 30,000 people a year in america. yet gun violence is a topic rarely discussed by our politicians. the silence is deafening. dan gross is the president of the brady campaign to prevent gun violence. >> some people have said the white house, even said today is not the day to have a conversation about gun violence, or gun control. would you agree or disagree with that? >> every day is the day to have a conversation about what we can do to prevent tragedies like the one that happened today. you know, yes, there was a tragedy today that is captured, very appropriately. you know the hearts and minds of the public. but every day in our nation, 32 people are murdered with guns. and the majority of those

instances are inherently preventible. and every day that we don't discuss it more people are dying unnecessarily. >> reporter: we contacted the nra about today's shooting. and they responded in an e-mail. until the facts are thoroughly known the nra will not have any comment. fighting tears, perhaps president obama did start the conversation this afternoon. >> as a country we have been through this too many times. whether its an elementary school in newtown, or a shopping mall in oregon. or a temple in wisconsin. or a movie theater in aurora or a street corner in chicago, these neighborhoods are our neighborhoods and these children are our children. and we're going to have to come together and take meaningful action to prevent more tragedies like this, regardless of the politics. >> reporter: harry smith is with us now, when i ran into you a little while ago, the first thing we said to each other, was man, we've seen this before.

we trot out that list and we go through jonesboro, and i noticed even tonight, in these trauma centers we can stand there and watch gunshot victims come in. >> you have spent all that time in chicago, you know what it was like this past summer. there was a weekend when 30 people were shot. ten people killed. not just one weekend, but several weekends. every day, every night in this country people are falling down dead because they have been shot. and what is amazing to me as we have covered these stories over all of these years is how little actual conversation there is in this country about are we just -- is this just okay? is this just all right? that 100,000 people a year have bullets go through their body? 30,000 die, but that is another 70,000 that are walking wounded. >> well, it is a two-part conversation. because the first part of the conversation, we're all united

today in this sense of grief and sadness and horror. but when you move to the second part of the natural conversation, the unity breaks apart. >> well, this is interesting, nobody really offered any kind of legislation. people like the brady group have even given up on even trying. i think it is very interesting, there is this equation that is available. there are more guns per capita in the united states than any other country on the face of earth except yemen, more than 300 million guns are in people's hands in the united states, the second amendment it may, in fact, be sacred to many, many people, but is there any kind of common ground to say that this can't go on the way it is going on? >> harry smith, thank you, let's go back now to brian in newtown. >> reporter: well, lester, here is another way to think of this

community. until this happened this morning, newtown, connecticut had what so many americans yearn for. it was a peaceful place. it had a terrific quality of life. all of that shattered with this one act by one young man. that part of this story tonight from nbc's kate snow. >> reporter: sandy hook elementary school is the kind of new england village that people drive hundreds of miles to see in the fall. majestic maples turn the town red, and weekenders looking for quaintness find it. but december is the real magic time here. lamp posts are draped with evergreens, and local firemen usually do a brisk business selling christmas trees. if norman rockwell were still alive and painting, he would paint sandy hook. >> there is no crime here, everybody is happy, family-oriented. >> reporter: this morning, christmas was so close, you

could smell it. then in an instant christmas never seemed further away. >> this is most definitely the worst thing we experienced here in town. >> reporter: maybe it was the setting and the season that gave today's slaughter of innocence such an awful resonance. >> as heartbreaking as it is, for something like that to happen, but so close to the holidays where everybody is supposed to be so happy. it breaks your heart. as a parent you know, thinking how you would feel. you know, you can't even imagine. >> reporter: marcy benitez runs a clothing store for children, on any other day her shop would be filled with voices and christmas wishes. this afternoon, only the sound on television news filled the emtiness. the clothes on her racks, mute reminders of those who will never wear them.

like everyone in town, marcy is heart sick, desperately trying to understand what happened. >> everybody is like family. you know, it is such a close knit community. and everybody knows each other and helps each other. you know, it is a heartbreaking situation. >> reporter: he moved here more than 30 years ago so his son, michael junior, could attend the schools. both father and son know families affected by the tragedy. >> we have reached out to a few. we don't have definite answers as far as status on everyone. but we're still hopeful and we're still looking out to find out some of the information about them. >> i would have never thought something of this horrific tragedy would have come to sandy hook. i mean, this is such a sweet town. >> reporter: at the local methodist church on the main street of town they opened the sanctuary this afternoon for people to come and pray. the red cross is setting up shop in the basement. >> just want to be here for people that need to be with god and to try to make sense out of this. and it doesn't make any sense. not in a place like this.

>> reporter: all over town, signs ask for prayers. state police shepherd shell-shocked families to their cars. and local firemen, many who rushed to the scene this morning, strongly tried to comfort family and friends of the dead children. what this community has been through today is unthinkable. >> everyone is coming together supporting everyone, working together, trying to answer all the questions as to how and why this occurred and trying to lend support to all the people involved. >> reporter: kate snow is with us from just across town. kate, i saw some of the pictures of the people streaming in there tonight. and it is so understandable, all people wanted was kind of the comfort of community. and having a companion to talk to. >> reporter: that is right, and remember, brian, this is a place where everyone knows everyone. so almost everyone knows a family that has been affected. i watched hundreds of people stream into the church behind me, the catholic church.

900 inside, hundreds more outside, looking into the window, from the cold. singing "silent night." and one thing that struck me, people who attended the elementary school. talking about what happened today. one little boy asked his mom, did the principal die? and she said i don't know. >> part of what makes it so sad, kate, you pointed out today earlier the beautiful decorations in the town. the crush behind you in front of the church. just the immovable truth in this story, that we're so close to the christmas holiday. kate snow who has been covering this for us all day. a couple of points, you hear the constant din behind us. we apologize. it is hard to hear because of the generators and the fire equipment. number two, parents are still coming from the school this late in the evening, over to the fire house.

we're not going to put them on television because they deserve their privacy. but finally i want to show you a live picture alongside the fire house right behind us. prior to what happened this morning, the most important thing going on at the fire house was the annual sale of christmas trees and wreaths. and they're just sitting there alongside this fire house, which is now part of the beating heart of this town, what is left of the spirit of this town where food is coming in. where the fbi have gathered. and where the investigation now goes on. we'll take a break here. when we come back, answering the questions so many parents have across this country. how do we talk to the kids about what has happened here in newtown? echo, e back in new

this is such a perverse story because it involves kids, little kids who did nothing wrong. all these lost souls it is hard enough for adults to process this, what do you say to the children? of course, no two cases are alike. but the experts do have advice on that part of the story, from nbc's natalie morales. >> reporter: as the nation tries to wrap its head around the violence. >> i was in the gym and heard a loud -- well, i heard like seven loud booms. and the gym teachers told us to go in the corner. >> reporter: tonight, parents

will hug their children a little tighter and struggle to comfort them. but how do they explain what they themselves can't understand? >> could anything be worse? all of a sudden, this mass shooting happens in the school, as parents we need to protect our kids and here on a massive scale, kids were not protected. >> reporter: the director of the nyu department of child psychology says parents need to prepare themselves before talking to their kids. >> make sure you're calm enough. you need to make sure that you are not feeling too much grief, too much anxiety, too much anger. make sure you are steady and have the conversation and it will go okay. >> when you are ready to approach your kids, there are certain things you should remember. >> you want to be owe sepen so child feels they can talk to you about whatever is bothering

them. but you went to be calming. >> reporter: whenever this kind of thing happens, parents might need to do mr. tho more than ju their kids to talk. >> letting them talk about their fears, a is calming. b you went to give them coping skills. ways to relax if they're starting to feel anxious. that might be anything from taking deep breaths, going for a run, something distracting, playing, you know, catch, watching something funny, engaging in something that is just, has nothing to do with any of this. >> reporter: if your child does start asking questions, salt says how much you reveal depend on his or her age. >> they're going to be teenagers who obviously are going to ask questions. and i think it's reasonable to answer those questions. but young children do not need to hear the nitty-gritty. >> reporter: no matter what their age, she says always tell the truth. >> you say be honest and tell them what happened, but do you tell them how many people died?

how many were injured? do you get into the details of death? >> i wouldn't offer the details of death. but if your child asks, i wouldn't evade and be dishonest about them. because they are going to hear. they need to know that they one can talk to you. and two, that you are going to be a source of information. if you're evading the details then that make it scarier for them. it tells them you are too frightened. >> when kids hear that other kids were victims does it make them feel even more unsafe? >> if you let them know that, that part of what is scary for them is just that they can imagine themselves in these shoes, because these were kids too. you understand that. and they can talk about that with you. but they're not these kids. you know this isn't going to happen to them. you shouldn't let them watch a lot of television. because it gives kids the illusion that it is happening more frequently. and it sort of retraumatizes them. >> reporter: parents should keep an eye out for warning signs of trauma. >> if your child is having

difficulty sleeping. if they're having an appetite change i you see a change in functioning of school. pulling away from friend. not wanting to leave home. having more difficulty concentrating on their work for example, then you want to, and they're telling you that they're worrying, then you might went to get them some sort of treatment. >> reporter: it is okay to let your children know it has been scary for you too. >> it it imprnt ortant to let k know that violence is frightening and okay to be afraid. you want to let them know you have it in perspective. while this is scary. it didn't happen to you. you are going to be okay. >> reporter: come monday morning when parents across the country send their kids off to school, feeling that hesitation, that fear, while they watch their child's backpack slowly slip out the door, they need to remember school shootings are extremely rare. >> the truth is this rarely

happens. it some times is easy to lose that perspective in the midst of tragedy. but it is very imprortant to kep that perspective. >> our friend and chief medical correspondent, dr. nancy snyderman it here mostly in her role as fellow parent tonight. nancy, one of the messages there, interesting, was kind of age appropriate honesty. >> yes. if you have a kindergartner who has no idea what happened today, there is no reason to bring it up. if you have a high school stew didn't who need to go through it. if they ask the hard questions. you don't lie. you don't offer things. what we tend to do, we tend to put our parental duties forward. we don't listen to what kids really want. the changes in beep hafr are important. one thing i think we haven't talked about art fe the first reresponders behind us. they're going home grieving, shocked. taik they take into their household a jarring new reality. kids pick up on that. so it is okay for a parent or

teacher to share their grief with their families. frankly, sometimes, let kids be part of the grief and console them. there are no time for family secrets. it is time for sharing the fact that this is rare, it's traumatic, but families come together in time like this, and they talk. when they talk they heal. >> i also have a feeling that not for lack of sympathy for empathy, a lot of an cans with families will try to go about their saturday tomorrow. >> that's important. i think getting become to normal. whether a new normal, your regular normal or whetheren a town like this it is a shocked altered reality of normal, the human condition requires that we take that next step forward. and i think that's important too. >> thank you, nancy. let's go back to lester in new york. >> brian, thanks. some of the images seared in my head and a lot of ours, images of parents clutching their children's hand. holding them leading them away from the scene of unspeakable

tragedy. we all put ourselves in that place. what would it be look to get that call. before we leave you tonight we wanted to share one last look at some of the most unforgettable and powerful images from this long and difficult day.

>> a difficult day captures in the photo. let's go back to brian in newt ne own for his final thoughts. >> it sounds trite. i don't know what to say or how you answer to this. when you look at the president of the united states and he comes up short at a loss for word. we later learned he had longer remarks to deliver, but he himself couldn't get through it. the question as we said at the top of the broadcast, lester, as you have been asking on the coverage all day -- who would kill these kids? where does this come from? how do we recover? it is, it may be unanswerable.

and the answer may be just to try to get through it. and a reminder to stay with your late local nuews tonight for th very latest on this story. i'll remind all of you, my colleague, lester holt will be joined tomorrow morning, for a special live edition of the "today" show. matt lauer and savannah guthrie along with lester for that. for our entire team. for my friend lester in new york, my team here on the ground in newtown, connecticut after a awfully dark day across this country. i'm brian